Are you “Just Surviving”??

There is one word that describes Stress. That word is “OVER”!! In today’s super-fast, super electronic world, we are overworked, overloaded and definitely OVERWHELMED. Here are some amazing tips to get you OVER those feelings. You can’t just read this and not implement these strategies in to your life. I know it sounds like even MORE work, but it is something that I have been practicing for a while now as I just could not settle myself down and it is proven so far to provide me with more peace, calmness and clarity in my life. Even my doc mentioned how much calmer I appeared 🙂 Sadly we are not super human know matter how much we would like to think we are.

You already know you have your plate extremely full right? If you are like me, you take on much more than you should. Learn to JUST SAY NO. Seriously, if someone asks you to do something and you do not want to do it, or don’t have the time, explain that to them. How could they possibly get mad at you for saying you just really can’t handle anything more right now. I also think to myself “if the situation was the other way around and I was asking for something from this person, would they help me?” Most often I don’t think they would because they too are in the same position. It is not being rude, it is taking care of YOU.  I hated to say no but I am growing to love it. Why? because when I am able to say no to something, it gives me the time to say yes to the things that are really a priority.

How many of you do not have any “to-do lists”? I was one of them. And I had so many different things going on in my head I really felt like it was going to explode. SO many things I felt like there was a tornado spinning around and I could not focus for anything. I am telling you, get out a notebook and create a list. On this list include the most important things in your life that you want to focus your time and energy on. My list includes my family, my friends, my health, my marriage, and my children, my business. So when a question arises if I will do something, I look at my list and ask myself if I have anything that needs to be done in regards to anything on that list. Did I spend enough quality time with my kids this week, did I exercise to take care of my health etc. If not, I know that I can say no without guilt because although it might be a great opportunity, it will only serve to distract me from the more important things.

Another important thing is to set goals. If you really want to live a life of purpose and fulfillment, it is of the utmost importance that you set goals. Don’t set all these unattainable goals that you know you can not accomplish. Start small with a few very simple, realistic, but specific goals. For instance if you are on a diet, say I will lose 1-2 pounds over the week by eating healthier and exercising at least twice a week. If you are trying to save money (which we all know can be very difficult) set aside an additional $10 per week for the next year and then take that money and do something fun with your loved ones. We all need get-away time from our daily lives. Even if you only have a few small but realistic goals to work toward, this can transform your entire motivation for living. Knowing you have this purpose, this reason –  you will feel like you are actually doing something and going somewhere, instead of just aimlessly spinning your wheels and putting yourself in self-exhausting.  Having too much going on and overloading yourself without seeing any results only leads to a very low energy level and takes away the passion you should have in life!

What are the biggest time suckers for most of us? Yep you guessed it, the phone, surfing the internet, texting etc. Learn to set specific phone hours and let your voicemail get the rest. Set times to surf the net, otherwise you know you will be on it ten times longer than planned. If Facebook has taken over your life, disable it for a few days and see how much you get accomplished. The world will really not end. If something is that important then the important people will know how to reach you otherwise. No I have never disabled my Facebook account, but I have learned to just check in and check out. Typically I only really look at it while I am waiting for something else (like at a doctors appt and there is nothing better to do). I really don’t think I am missing much as Facebook has really turned in to LOTS AND LOTS of ads and people sharing the same information over and over and over. Don’t get me wrong, I love interacting with people on Facebook but I have realized it is more of a distraction when I should be focusing on my list. It is OK to shut off all electronics and you will not die. In fact, you might discover what you have been missing while you have been too busy watching for the latest status update from someone else. Seriously, do you ever get depressed when reading Facebook and seeing other people on vacation or pics of friends and family doing fun things together? Yes, they post these but they obviously were not on Facebook when they were doing them. You too can be doing these fun things.

For many, many years, I lacked sleep because I just could not go to bed if there was something I felt needed to be done. Guess what? Again, we do not have super powers, we are not robots, and time simple moves too fast to complete EVERYTHING in a day. Make sleep a priority. It is ok to let the dishes sit in the sink, it is ok to let the laundry sit in the dryer overnight, no you do not have to find that “thing” you just thought about because your really not going to use it tonight or maybe at all for that matter. If you have trouble sleeping, try putting some lavender oil on the bottom of your feet. From someone who took hours to go to sleep previously, I can tell you that your eyes will be closed and you will be sleeping like a baby within a half hour.  I know the temptation of staying up late to accomplish things when all others are snuggled in their bed and the house is quiet. BUT I also know that lack of sleep has taken a great toll on my mind and body over the years. If you feel extremely worn out during the day even a 10 or 15-minute catnap can do wonders! It is your body telling you what it needs and it is ok to relax and take care of yourself.

I have been a Debbie Downer on myself most of my life. Feeling like I don’t measure up, or I am not good enough, I am a failure, no one likes me, etc. They are all lies and don’t let yourself believe NONE of it. You can not have a positive life with a negative mind.  It is hard to recognize what you are doing to yourself when you are in that state of mind. You have to start replacing those words with the truth. I am good enough because I am trying my best, people do like me but maybe they are just having their own bad day – don’t take it personally. I always thought people were mad at me because of THEIR attitude, then I realized that everyone goes through their own thing which of course reflects in their attitude, but it is important not to take it as they are upset with you. Especially when you know you have not done anything. Read something positive everyday, surround yourself with people who believe in you. If you hear others complaining or whining, try to walk away because there will always be those unhappy people who just WON’T try hard enough to get out of that negative funk and they will try to drag you down.

Another thing you can do each day is to take the time to write down in a journal what you are grateful for. This doesn’t take a whole lot of time and doesn’t have to be perfectly written. But it will give you something to look at and reflect upon when you are having a bad day. And hopefully it will lift you up and remind you on the many blessings you already have in your life that we all take for granted.

Each of us are different, but there is one thing that is true for all of us. We ALL need time to refuel our tank. We simply can not just give and give and give without completely wearing ourselves out. You may be refreshed by going for a walk, doing yoga, reading a book just for pleasure, maybe having coffee or cocoa in front of a cozy fire. Whatever it is, figure out what refreshes you and make sure to do this for at least 15 minutes a day. If you do not take care of yourself first, you won’t be as valuable as you can be to everything else – your kids, your spouse, your job, your family, your pets – the list can go on and on.

Just be good to yourself and enjoy life!

HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY!

Rebeca~