One isn’t always a lonely number.

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The Numeral Uno Habit of Highly Creative People!!!

“In order to be open to creativity, one must have the capacity for contructive use of solitude. One must overcome the fear of being alone.” ~Rollo May

What habits do creative people have that makes them so successful at being creative???

I’ve thought about my own creative habits, but decided to research the habits that others consider the most important to their creativity.

Rather than list EVERYTHING I found in reviewing their lists, and then comparing to my own, there was one that stood out the most to me. I think it’s the most important habit when it comes to creativity.

What is it you ask?
In one word it’s SOLITUDE!

At least for me and the many creative geniuses I researched, it seems that creativity flourishes in solitude. Within your quiet zone, you can hear your thoughts, you can reach deep down within yourself, and you can focus.

In the past I really didn’t like being alone. Especially when i was so used to being around lots of people and chaos the last 10 years. However after a few months of finally getting that whether i wanted it or not, I discovered many benefits from solitude.

You actually have time for thought, you get to know yourself, you have
space to create, space to unwind, you find peace, you have time to reflect on what you’ve created, and you learn from it. Really, isolating yourself from the influences of other helps you to find our own voice. The quietness helps to appreciate the smaller things that get lost in the madness life can bring.

Its very important to make it a habit NOT to judge yourself on your creative output. Sometimes your creativity is on fire. Thats great and feels amazing!! but other times, it’s not. You just can’t get down about this. We all have slumps!

Live a creative life everyday. I very much believe in doing creative stuff everyday. When I’m starting to feel in a rut I make a habit of trying a different routine, make something you never thought you would, just shake your own tree and use your imagination.

Find your fun!! Doing what you love inspires you to be more creative.

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“Creativity is essentially a lonely art. An even lonelier struggle. To some a blessing. To others a curse. It is in reality the ability to reach inside yourself and drag forth from your very soul an idea.” ~Lou Dorfsman

It’s officially FRIDAY- have a BEAUTIFUL weekend!

Rebeca~

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Daily Must Do’s for YOU!

HAPPY FRIDAY!!! I want to share with you a few things that I think we should all practice daily. In my opinion I think these things will give you an overall sense of well-being AND you will probably make others feel pretty darn special too 😉

Do you ever feel like you are just not appreciated? I believe in good and bad karma. Therefore if someone has helped you in some way, and just made your day a tad bit easier – make sure you let them know that with a BIG….

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This not only will show others you respect them, but it will most likely be returned back to you when it is your time to receive.

SLOW THE HECK DOWN. Take a measly 15 minutes out of your day to enjoy yourself. Clear your mind – you will be amazed with the inspiration that comes your way when you are feeling at peace. I prefer to start my mornings like this.

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Remember that list I talked about in my post yesterday? Probably not cause I don’t think many read it :((( Anyways if you are like me, you can be crazy busy and feel like you never accomplish anything. So DO and check one thing off your to-do list. Did you forget to return a phone call? Do you have a never-ending amount of e-mails you need to clean out? Just do at least one thing that has been really bothering you. It will give you so much relief and a good sense of accomplishment.

EAT at least one healthy & nutritious meal a day. One of my favorites is a chicken salad. I never get bored with these as you can always add or subtract stuff so they taste different each time.

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Perform ONE or more if you like, random acts of kindness!  The concept of “paying it forward” is REAL and EFFECTIVE. Here is a simple list of ways to accomplish this in the photo below…

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GIVE someone your full attention. Always listen without bearing judgments or criticism. Try to avoid giving any self-referencing (meaning don’t turn what they are saying around on you) and really be fully present for whoever needs it. Five minutes of your time is nothing but it sure could change a person’s entire day. Which in return should make you feel good as well.

Try your best to focus on one thing at a time (I know I have a HUGE problem with this but am working on it diligently – it REALLY takes focus) You are only one person and you can’t do everything. I expressed before and I will say it again, it is OK to say NO. I know how hard this is, try not to be rude about it, but remember it is not doing you any good to take on things when you already have your plate full. THIS CREATES STRESS!

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Have you made your goal list yet? If not, do it today. It has been proven that there is a direct correlation between people who have written, stated goals and their level of accomplishment compared to people who do not. Can you guess who accomplishes more? But don’t forget to make your goals SMART ones.

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And last but certainly NOT LEAST – tell those you love that you love them. There has been SO MANY DEATHS lately in my neck of the woods. It is heartbreaking. Don’t wait- tell them today because there is no day but today!

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May peace, joy, happiness and all things good come your way today and everyday. Have a FANTABULOUS weekend!

Rebeca~

Are you “Just Surviving”??

There is one word that describes Stress. That word is “OVER”!! In today’s super-fast, super electronic world, we are overworked, overloaded and definitely OVERWHELMED. Here are some amazing tips to get you OVER those feelings. You can’t just read this and not implement these strategies in to your life. I know it sounds like even MORE work, but it is something that I have been practicing for a while now as I just could not settle myself down and it is proven so far to provide me with more peace, calmness and clarity in my life. Even my doc mentioned how much calmer I appeared 🙂 Sadly we are not super human know matter how much we would like to think we are.

You already know you have your plate extremely full right? If you are like me, you take on much more than you should. Learn to JUST SAY NO. Seriously, if someone asks you to do something and you do not want to do it, or don’t have the time, explain that to them. How could they possibly get mad at you for saying you just really can’t handle anything more right now. I also think to myself “if the situation was the other way around and I was asking for something from this person, would they help me?” Most often I don’t think they would because they too are in the same position. It is not being rude, it is taking care of YOU.  I hated to say no but I am growing to love it. Why? because when I am able to say no to something, it gives me the time to say yes to the things that are really a priority.

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How many of you do not have any “to-do lists”? I was one of them. And I had so many different things going on in my head I really felt like it was going to explode. SO many things I felt like there was a tornado spinning around and I could not focus for anything. I am telling you, get out a notebook and create a list. On this list include the most important things in your life that you want to focus your time and energy on. My list includes my family, my friends, my health, my marriage, and my children, my business. So when a question arises if I will do something, I look at my list and ask myself if I have anything that needs to be done in regards to anything on that list. Did I spend enough quality time with my kids this week, did I exercise to take care of my health etc. If not, I know that I can say no without guilt because although it might be a great opportunity, it will only serve to distract me from the more important things.

Another important thing is to set goals. If you really want to live a life of purpose and fulfillment, it is of the utmost importance that you set goals. Don’t set all these unattainable goals that you know you can not accomplish. Start small with a few very simple, realistic, but specific goals. For instance if you are on a diet, say I will lose 1-2 pounds over the week by eating healthier and exercising at least twice a week. If you are trying to save money (which we all know can be very difficult) set aside an additional $10 per week for the next year and then take that money and do something fun with your loved ones. We all need get-away time from our daily lives. Even if you only have a few small but realistic goals to work toward, this can transform your entire motivation for living. Knowing you have this purpose, this reason –  you will feel like you are actually doing something and going somewhere, instead of just aimlessly spinning your wheels and putting yourself in self-exhausting.  Having too much going on and overloading yourself without seeing any results only leads to a very low energy level and takes away the passion you should have in life!

What are the biggest time suckers for most of us? Yep you guessed it, the phone, surfing the internet, texting etc. Learn to set specific phone hours and let your voicemail get the rest. Set times to surf the net, otherwise you know you will be on it ten times longer than planned. If Facebook has taken over your life, disable it for a few days and see how much you get accomplished. The world will really not end. If something is that important then the important people will know how to reach you otherwise. No I have never disabled my Facebook account, but I have learned to just check in and check out. Typically I only really look at it while I am waiting for something else (like at a doctors appt and there is nothing better to do). I really don’t think I am missing much as Facebook has really turned in to LOTS AND LOTS of ads and people sharing the same information over and over and over. Don’t get me wrong, I love interacting with people on Facebook but I have realized it is more of a distraction when I should be focusing on my list. It is OK to shut off all electronics and you will not die. In fact, you might discover what you have been missing while you have been too busy watching for the latest status update from someone else. Seriously, do you ever get depressed when reading Facebook and seeing other people on vacation or pics of friends and family doing fun things together? Yes, they post these but they obviously were not on Facebook when they were doing them. You too can be doing these fun things.

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For many, many years, I lacked sleep because I just could not go to bed if there was something I felt needed to be done. Guess what? Again, we do not have super powers, we are not robots, and time simple moves too fast to complete EVERYTHING in a day. Make sleep a priority. It is ok to let the dishes sit in the sink, it is ok to let the laundry sit in the dryer overnight, no you do not have to find that “thing” you just thought about because your really not going to use it tonight or maybe at all for that matter. If you have trouble sleeping, try putting some lavender oil on the bottom of your feet. From someone who took hours to go to sleep previously, I can tell you that your eyes will be closed and you will be sleeping like a baby within a half hour.  I know the temptation of staying up late to accomplish things when all others are snuggled in their bed and the house is quiet. BUT I also know that lack of sleep has taken a great toll on my mind and body over the years. If you feel extremely worn out during the day even a 10 or 15-minute catnap can do wonders! It is your body telling you what it needs and it is ok to relax and take care of yourself.

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I have been a Debbie Downer on myself most of my life. Feeling like I don’t measure up, or I am not good enough, I am a failure, no one likes me, etc. They are all lies and don’t let yourself believe NONE of it. You can not have a positive life with a negative mind.  It is hard to recognize what you are doing to yourself when you are in that state of mind. You have to start replacing those words with the truth. I am good enough because I am trying my best, people do like me but maybe they are just having their own bad day – don’t take it personally. I always thought people were mad at me because of THEIR attitude, then I realized that everyone goes through their own thing which of course reflects in their attitude, but it is important not to take it as they are upset with you. Especially when you know you have not done anything. Read something positive everyday, surround yourself with people who believe in you. If you hear others complaining or whining, try to walk away because there will always be those unhappy people who just WON’T try hard enough to get out of that negative funk and they will try to drag you down.

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Another thing you can do each day is to take the time to write down in a journal what you are grateful for. This doesn’t take a whole lot of time and doesn’t have to be perfectly written. But it will give you something to look at and reflect upon when you are having a bad day. And hopefully it will lift you up and remind you on the many blessings you already have in your life that we all take for granted.

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Each of us are different, but there is one thing that is true for all of us. We ALL need time to refuel our tank. We simply can not just give and give and give without completely wearing ourselves out. You may be refreshed by going for a walk, doing yoga, reading a book just for pleasure, maybe having coffee or cocoa in front of a cozy fire. Whatever it is, figure out what refreshes you and make sure to do this for at least 15 minutes a day. If you do not take care of yourself first, you won’t be as valuable as you can be to everything else – your kids, your spouse, your job, your family, your pets – the list can go on and on.

Just be good to yourself and enjoy life!

HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY!

Rebeca~

 

Talk to the hand cause the ears aren’t listening!

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Do you feel others are acting this way when you try to talk to them? You have something REALLY important and exciting you want to share but no one will listen or pay attention? How about when you say something and no one acknowledges you said it, but then the jerk off next to you says the EXACT same thing and he/she actually get listened to? Frustrating huh?

Learning how to communicate effectively takes work – BUT I am here to give you several tips to get your point across so others HEAR you. Of course it may not always work, but it is worth a shot don’t cha think? These can be used in business or in personal situations.

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First off, you have to know what it is you really want to communicate. Many people, including myself, fly off the handle too quickly. Gather your thoughts before you speak. It is also important to know your facts and the reasons. Putting them in order also helps a great deal so you’re not jumping back and forth from one thing to another.

Do NOT try to talk to someone about something when clearly their mind is in a hundred different places and they are distracted with many other things. If it appears to be that way, then ask them if you can schedule a few minutes with them later when they are free so that you will have their undivided attention.

Depending on WHAT you have to say, you really need to pick a good time and a good location. If it is complex and important, then picking a crowded noisy room at night is probably not the best choice.

Sometimes the difference between being listened to and NOT is only the tone and pitch of your voice. Speak firmly, yet do it with assurance. I can promise you from MUCH experience that yelling and sounding childish (but..but…but..) will get you no further then when you first opened your mouth. If you have to practice, record yourself and listen to it. How do you think others will HEAR what you are saying?

Not all people understand things when spoken to. Many people I know understand things much easier if there is some type of visual. No this does not mean flinging your hands in the air and holding up fingers – ha ha. If telling simply isn’t working try using pictures or other images along with your voice.

Mind your intent. What does this mean? When you speak what you do, you do so not only through your words, but also your tone of voice and your body language. Keep focused on persuasion, learn to frame your arguments and the ideas you present within the context of helping others learn and understand. Do not force them to agree with you. People can agree to disagree. If your just wanting someone to agree with you, instead of really wanting them to understand what you are saying then chances are the other person may be listening in one ear and letting it all go out the other.

I know good communication skills are probably one of the most important skills you can have in life. I have done A LOT of yelling trying to get people to listen and to get my point across WITHOUT any success I might add. So I did some research, am currently testing these ideas out and they are working so I wanted to share 🙂

Other than that – we got spoiled with few beautiful warm days here in northern MN. But thats over. The Igloo being built around my home is darn near completion (I seriously can’t see out some of my windows because the snow is THAT DEEP). This is going to be one interesting SLOPPY spring coming at us.

Enjoy today because its FRIDAY and who doesn’t love a Friday?

Rebeca~

If your happy and you know it clap your hands. If your not… read on!

Hey world – so I have been busting my hiney for the last 6 months trying this whole self-employment biz. It certainly is not easy cheesy. But when you want it bad enough you have to PUSH yourself beyond what you thought you were capable of. During this time there have been lots of highs and LOTS of lows already and I am sure there is more to come. I got to a point where I just needed to take a break and do some soul-searching. I think I have discovered a few things by taking that much-needed break. More to come on that but wanted to share a few tips for those that really need a quick and easy pick me up.

THREE TIPS ON HOW TO GET YOURSELF OUT OF THAT NO FUN FUNK!!!

Sing – It really does relieve depression. It doesn’t matter if you have a top artist voice or not – crank up those upbeat tunes and belt it out. It will make you feel MUCH better and change your mood. Dancing works too!! Stay AWAY from teary music that will bring you right back down. I love myself some good old country music too BUT it is best not to listen to those sob songs when you yourself are feeling down. Sing in your kitchen while you cook or sing in your car (who really cares if someone sees you – personally when I see someone singing their heart out in their car it really makes me laugh and smile). Trust me, it makes a big difference to release your tensions through singing.

When you are feeling REALLY low and just want to hide and vegetate – find a friend to give you that much needed kick in the butt. You know – the one who asks you to do things and you always say no because your feeling blah and don’t wanna leave your house. GO DO IT – GO DO SOMETHING. You never know what will happen when you do. It could change your life. You find inspiration outside your home and you never know when you will run in to that one person who can connect you to your  next amazing friendship or business opportunity.

Try something new and exciting. Even if your not that type of person to get “outside your box” – Just as we tell our children to try new foods etc. you will NEVER know how exciting something is or how much you may love it until you do it – JUST DO IT!!

I can not tell you how much reading self-love articles helps me. It is very important for those who pick on themselves to do this. You need to love yourself before you can love anyone else. And chances are, if you don’t love yourself others will have a hard time too. People are drawn to people with positive confident attitudes. Wake up each morning, look in the mirror and tell yourself “I love myself, I love who I am and today is going to be a great day”. Test it out. It really works.

I do not go to church every Sunday, in fact I don’t go at all (maybe once a year). I am not a big “Holy Roller” as some might refer to those who constantly refer to religious beliefs on everything BUT I do believe in God. Having conversations with God is a true gift. It is not only a way to vent and be still with yourself, but it really helps to refocus when your mind is all over the place. I am supposed to get this daily devotional I signed up for about what “God wants me to know”, however I don’t get it daily for some reason. I DO however get it right when I need it, AND it always says just what I really need to hear. It blows my mind and gives me this rush inside because often it is at my breaking points when I receive these messages. And they come the day after I have been crying my eyes out in the shower begging for some answers. I know I know, God has nothing to do with computers and e-mails and all that Jazz but I also know he works in mysterious ways – he works through people. To me there is NO other explanation of how this happens at the right time.

“The moment your ready to quit is usually the moment right before the miracle happens. Don’t Give Up!”

With Much Love,

Rebeca~

 

 

Truth be told…Letting it all out!!

Good Morning,

After reading another Blog post this morning it really inspired me to do this. As boring as it may be I feel the need to let it all out!

Like many people I am sure, I feel so overwhelmed with life. We all have things we keep private but for the most part I am an open book. I mention a little about myself under the page titled “my crazy self” but there is so much more I need to vent about. Isn’t that what blogs are for? ha ha

I never hide my age for one. Do I wish I could go back a few years? Of course – who doesn’t, but we all know that can’t happen so we might as well learn from mistakes and move forward. I am 38 years old and will be 39 in June. I will look at 40 as the new 20.  However there are some days I wish I could actually fast forward to retirement age – 🙂 My kids will be 16 and 12 this year. I spent the majority of their childhood getting my Bachelor’s degree online. I was on my computer from 8 a.m. to midnight nearly every night for 5 years and that is when I wasn’t at work. I REALLY regret that. Not that I went to school but that I basically dedicated too much time on it and not enough with my kids when they actually wanted me to be involved. Now they are to the age where they tell me “quit treating me like I am 5” which I probably do because I have guilt and I missed the opportunity to do so many fun and memorable things with them. My kids are my life and if that is one thing I could do over, it would be to spend MUCH MORE quality time with them and forget about everything else because we all know how fast they grow up. Thankfully I believe they still love me, I still get hugs and kisses, and they have turned out to be caring and respectable kids (although not perfect because there is no such thing as a perfect kid or adult for that matter).

My husband and I have been married for 10 years (11 this March). I will never portray that we have the perfect marriage because we don’t. In fact, the first 5 years were extremely rough. But we got through it, and although we fight every now and then, and we are completely opposite of one another, we make it work and we love each other. I don’t know if I believe in the theory that “opposites attract”, in fact many days I wish he were more like me – wanting to try new things, etc. but he is content with living the average life of working to pay bills and trying to have a little extra to spend on whatever. He works hard, he does the grocery shopping and he cooks a lot of the time. He is a good man and a good father. Then I have my days where I wish I could be content like that – being happy with exactly what it is we already have but sadly I am not – which I will get to shortly.

My health –  I can’t say I am an unhealthy person. I eat right, I go through spurts of exercise routines, and I get a ton of exercise going up and down my stairs a hundred times a day. I do have high blood pressure and have been taking meds for that for YEARS, and I have had five surgeries – two which have been on my back – I am literally built with titanium! But I do not let that hold me back from much. I probably lift things and do things I should not be doing, but I refuse to act like I am 90 with back problems. I let years and years of suffering get me all depressed, the nerve pain was so bad I wanted to CUT my leg off. But as with everything else in my life, I got it fixed and got through it. I think the majority of the world has some sort of health issue and we just gotta deal with it and not let it get the best of us.

WORK!!! Oh where to start. I have had many jobs since I first started working at the age of 15. I did a paper route with my brother, was a waitress, did some misc. office jobs, was a nursing assistant for awhile, went to school for real estate but didn’t study hard enough for the test and failed it, but I didn’t try again because at the time I found a job I really enjoyed and ended up staying there for a few years. I went to Cosmetology school and did hair on and off for about 5 years but for some ODD reason my hands started itching. It was like sticking them in fiberglass when I touched someones hair. I wore gloves for a year (NOT FUN) and I decided it was time to give it up. My dream of owning my own salon and spa went down the drain. What to do next. I decided to go back to school online. I got my AS degree in Marketing and Management and my BA degree in an Individualized Degree (this was awesome because ALL my college credits from before transferred in and I was able to take classes that really interested me. While I was finishing my BA I was a staffing specialist for a staffing agency (loved the job but management NOT SO MUCH). Because of that job, I decided to have my focus area be in Human Resources. The one class I was short of an actual HR degree was Algebra. Never got it, and never will. But I am really good with numbers (weird huh). I can do statistics, economics, accounting, just not ALGEBRA. I blame my 9th grade teacher who was very mean and would never re-explain things. Anyway, when I left the staffing agency, I was also working PT for my brothers trucking company doing billing and general office stuff. I also started working for the local school district as a Para (providing one on one assistance to students with emotional, behavioral and psychical disabilities). I liked that job too but since it was not what I was going to school for and things started getting to be too much with going to school FT online and 2 jobs, I decided to quit. I had plans to move when I completed my Degree but my husband and kids did not want to and they wanted me full time at the trucking company so I did that. Long story short I was there over 8 years, the company grew fast, working with family became even more stressful and I had to make a choice to either leave or risk my health and ruining my close relationship with my family. There were many family members working there. At the end of August 2013 I chose to leave sadly. Working for family is HARD STUFF!!

Six months ago till now…. What a whirlwind. I thought for sure with all my experience and education I would be able to get SOME type of job for reasonable pay. WRONG!!! I don’t know why I thought that – after all, I have lived here most of my life and know how it is. I went through 3 months of MAJOR depression. Crying everyday and feeling worthless. I have applied at over 80 companies and spent countless hours doing cover letters, tweaking my resume and filling out online apps. It is a wee bit FRUSTRATING to have experience and education and probably a better work ethic than many and not be able to get even a simple general office job. Because there was no way in heck I could just sit around and just look for work for someone else, I decided to start my own business. I found some hobbies of crafting and decided to start selling my stuff online. My friend does it and is very successful. It is going pretty good but it is a competitive market out there. I am pretty proud of what I have accomplished so far, but it is still not bringing home the bacon like I need it to and it is A LOT of work. The good thing about it is that I enjoy it. I don’t necessarily enjoy 15+ hour days but I am my own boss, the entrepreneur I believed I was always meant to be. No I don’t know if this is what I was meant to do or not, but I am going for it and I will find my niche sooner or later. In all honestly my passion is helping others, whether that be finding a job, making them feel confident about themselves, maybe hooking them up with someone else etc. Making others feel happy is what makes me happy. It is such a great feeling knowing you made a difference to someone. Even if it is the smallest thing. It makes my whole day when someone buys something from me and I get an email saying how much they love it. Awesome – Awesome – Awesome.

Many people call me crazy – not because they think I am really “insane” but because I am always going, going, going… I can’t slow down. And when I try to slow down I get lazy and I don’t like it. My head is over flowing with so many things, so many ideas, so many thoughts, I wish I had an external hard drive to plug into so I could I could put it all in there and get back to it when I am finished with the countless other things I have to be doing at all times. Ha ha But I am me, and I am proud of all the experience I have gained over the years. Some people might look at the variety of jobs I have had negatively. To me, it has made me WELL-ROUNDED. As the saying goes “I am a Jack of all Trades and Master of None”. But that is ok with me. Because I would rather know a little about a lot of things then a lot about one thing. I am a life-long learner and plan to learn as much as my brain can handle. I am going to LIVE LIFE to its fullest potential!! Well as full as I can living where I am unless I can convince my family to all move south with me 🙂 I DO NOT LOVE THESE LONG COLD WINTERS.

Have a great day – stay POSITIVE and thanks for reading my lengthy post.

Rebeca~