Talk to the hand cause the ears aren’t listening!

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Do you feel others are acting this way when you try to talk to them? You have something REALLY important and exciting you want to share but no one will listen or pay attention? How about when you say something and no one acknowledges you said it, but then the jerk off next to you says the EXACT same thing and he/she actually get listened to? Frustrating huh?

Learning how to communicate effectively takes work – BUT I am here to give you several tips to get your point across so others HEAR you. Of course it may not always work, but it is worth a shot don’t cha think? These can be used in business or in personal situations.

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First off, you have to know what it is you really want to communicate. Many people, including myself, fly off the handle too quickly. Gather your thoughts before you speak. It is also important to know your facts and the reasons. Putting them in order also helps a great deal so you’re not jumping back and forth from one thing to another.

Do NOT try to talk to someone about something when clearly their mind is in a hundred different places and they are distracted with many other things. If it appears to be that way, then ask them if you can schedule a few minutes with them later when they are free so that you will have their undivided attention.

Depending on WHAT you have to say, you really need to pick a good time and a good location. If it is complex and important, then picking a crowded noisy room at night is probably not the best choice.

Sometimes the difference between being listened to and NOT is only the tone and pitch of your voice. Speak firmly, yet do it with assurance. I can promise you from MUCH experience that yelling and sounding childish (but..but…but..) will get you no further then when you first opened your mouth. If you have to practice, record yourself and listen to it. How do you think others will HEAR what you are saying?

Not all people understand things when spoken to. Many people I know understand things much easier if there is some type of visual. No this does not mean flinging your hands in the air and holding up fingers – ha ha. If telling simply isn’t working try using pictures or other images along with your voice.

Mind your intent. What does this mean? When you speak what you do, you do so not only through your words, but also your tone of voice and your body language. Keep focused on persuasion, learn to frame your arguments and the ideas you present within the context of helping others learn and understand. Do not force them to agree with you. People can agree to disagree. If your just wanting someone to agree with you, instead of really wanting them to understand what you are saying then chances are the other person may be listening in one ear and letting it all go out the other.

I know good communication skills are probably one of the most important skills you can have in life. I have done A LOT of yelling trying to get people to listen and to get my point across WITHOUT any success I might add. So I did some research, am currently testing these ideas out and they are working so I wanted to share 🙂

Other than that – we got spoiled with few beautiful warm days here in northern MN. But thats over. The Igloo being built around my home is darn near completion (I seriously can’t see out some of my windows because the snow is THAT DEEP). This is going to be one interesting SLOPPY spring coming at us.

Enjoy today because its FRIDAY and who doesn’t love a Friday?

Rebeca~

If your happy and you know it clap your hands. If your not… read on!

Hey world – so I have been busting my hiney for the last 6 months trying this whole self-employment biz. It certainly is not easy cheesy. But when you want it bad enough you have to PUSH yourself beyond what you thought you were capable of. During this time there have been lots of highs and LOTS of lows already and I am sure there is more to come. I got to a point where I just needed to take a break and do some soul-searching. I think I have discovered a few things by taking that much-needed break. More to come on that but wanted to share a few tips for those that really need a quick and easy pick me up.

THREE TIPS ON HOW TO GET YOURSELF OUT OF THAT NO FUN FUNK!!!

Sing – It really does relieve depression. It doesn’t matter if you have a top artist voice or not – crank up those upbeat tunes and belt it out. It will make you feel MUCH better and change your mood. Dancing works too!! Stay AWAY from teary music that will bring you right back down. I love myself some good old country music too BUT it is best not to listen to those sob songs when you yourself are feeling down. Sing in your kitchen while you cook or sing in your car (who really cares if someone sees you – personally when I see someone singing their heart out in their car it really makes me laugh and smile). Trust me, it makes a big difference to release your tensions through singing.

When you are feeling REALLY low and just want to hide and vegetate – find a friend to give you that much needed kick in the butt. You know – the one who asks you to do things and you always say no because your feeling blah and don’t wanna leave your house. GO DO IT – GO DO SOMETHING. You never know what will happen when you do. It could change your life. You find inspiration outside your home and you never know when you will run in to that one person who can connect you to your  next amazing friendship or business opportunity.

Try something new and exciting. Even if your not that type of person to get “outside your box” – Just as we tell our children to try new foods etc. you will NEVER know how exciting something is or how much you may love it until you do it – JUST DO IT!!

I can not tell you how much reading self-love articles helps me. It is very important for those who pick on themselves to do this. You need to love yourself before you can love anyone else. And chances are, if you don’t love yourself others will have a hard time too. People are drawn to people with positive confident attitudes. Wake up each morning, look in the mirror and tell yourself “I love myself, I love who I am and today is going to be a great day”. Test it out. It really works.

I do not go to church every Sunday, in fact I don’t go at all (maybe once a year). I am not a big “Holy Roller” as some might refer to those who constantly refer to religious beliefs on everything BUT I do believe in God. Having conversations with God is a true gift. It is not only a way to vent and be still with yourself, but it really helps to refocus when your mind is all over the place. I am supposed to get this daily devotional I signed up for about what “God wants me to know”, however I don’t get it daily for some reason. I DO however get it right when I need it, AND it always says just what I really need to hear. It blows my mind and gives me this rush inside because often it is at my breaking points when I receive these messages. And they come the day after I have been crying my eyes out in the shower begging for some answers. I know I know, God has nothing to do with computers and e-mails and all that Jazz but I also know he works in mysterious ways – he works through people. To me there is NO other explanation of how this happens at the right time.

“The moment your ready to quit is usually the moment right before the miracle happens. Don’t Give Up!”

With Much Love,

Rebeca~

 

 

Truth be told…Letting it all out!!

Good Morning,

After reading another Blog post this morning it really inspired me to do this. As boring as it may be I feel the need to let it all out!

Like many people I am sure, I feel so overwhelmed with life. We all have things we keep private but for the most part I am an open book. I mention a little about myself under the page titled “my crazy self” but there is so much more I need to vent about. Isn’t that what blogs are for? ha ha

I never hide my age for one. Do I wish I could go back a few years? Of course – who doesn’t, but we all know that can’t happen so we might as well learn from mistakes and move forward. I am 38 years old and will be 39 in June. I will look at 40 as the new 20.  However there are some days I wish I could actually fast forward to retirement age – 🙂 My kids will be 16 and 12 this year. I spent the majority of their childhood getting my Bachelor’s degree online. I was on my computer from 8 a.m. to midnight nearly every night for 5 years and that is when I wasn’t at work. I REALLY regret that. Not that I went to school but that I basically dedicated too much time on it and not enough with my kids when they actually wanted me to be involved. Now they are to the age where they tell me “quit treating me like I am 5” which I probably do because I have guilt and I missed the opportunity to do so many fun and memorable things with them. My kids are my life and if that is one thing I could do over, it would be to spend MUCH MORE quality time with them and forget about everything else because we all know how fast they grow up. Thankfully I believe they still love me, I still get hugs and kisses, and they have turned out to be caring and respectable kids (although not perfect because there is no such thing as a perfect kid or adult for that matter).

My husband and I have been married for 10 years (11 this March). I will never portray that we have the perfect marriage because we don’t. In fact, the first 5 years were extremely rough. But we got through it, and although we fight every now and then, and we are completely opposite of one another, we make it work and we love each other. I don’t know if I believe in the theory that “opposites attract”, in fact many days I wish he were more like me – wanting to try new things, etc. but he is content with living the average life of working to pay bills and trying to have a little extra to spend on whatever. He works hard, he does the grocery shopping and he cooks a lot of the time. He is a good man and a good father. Then I have my days where I wish I could be content like that – being happy with exactly what it is we already have but sadly I am not – which I will get to shortly.

My health –  I can’t say I am an unhealthy person. I eat right, I go through spurts of exercise routines, and I get a ton of exercise going up and down my stairs a hundred times a day. I do have high blood pressure and have been taking meds for that for YEARS, and I have had five surgeries – two which have been on my back – I am literally built with titanium! But I do not let that hold me back from much. I probably lift things and do things I should not be doing, but I refuse to act like I am 90 with back problems. I let years and years of suffering get me all depressed, the nerve pain was so bad I wanted to CUT my leg off. But as with everything else in my life, I got it fixed and got through it. I think the majority of the world has some sort of health issue and we just gotta deal with it and not let it get the best of us.

WORK!!! Oh where to start. I have had many jobs since I first started working at the age of 15. I did a paper route with my brother, was a waitress, did some misc. office jobs, was a nursing assistant for awhile, went to school for real estate but didn’t study hard enough for the test and failed it, but I didn’t try again because at the time I found a job I really enjoyed and ended up staying there for a few years. I went to Cosmetology school and did hair on and off for about 5 years but for some ODD reason my hands started itching. It was like sticking them in fiberglass when I touched someones hair. I wore gloves for a year (NOT FUN) and I decided it was time to give it up. My dream of owning my own salon and spa went down the drain. What to do next. I decided to go back to school online. I got my AS degree in Marketing and Management and my BA degree in an Individualized Degree (this was awesome because ALL my college credits from before transferred in and I was able to take classes that really interested me. While I was finishing my BA I was a staffing specialist for a staffing agency (loved the job but management NOT SO MUCH). Because of that job, I decided to have my focus area be in Human Resources. The one class I was short of an actual HR degree was Algebra. Never got it, and never will. But I am really good with numbers (weird huh). I can do statistics, economics, accounting, just not ALGEBRA. I blame my 9th grade teacher who was very mean and would never re-explain things. Anyway, when I left the staffing agency, I was also working PT for my brothers trucking company doing billing and general office stuff. I also started working for the local school district as a Para (providing one on one assistance to students with emotional, behavioral and psychical disabilities). I liked that job too but since it was not what I was going to school for and things started getting to be too much with going to school FT online and 2 jobs, I decided to quit. I had plans to move when I completed my Degree but my husband and kids did not want to and they wanted me full time at the trucking company so I did that. Long story short I was there over 8 years, the company grew fast, working with family became even more stressful and I had to make a choice to either leave or risk my health and ruining my close relationship with my family. There were many family members working there. At the end of August 2013 I chose to leave sadly. Working for family is HARD STUFF!!

Six months ago till now…. What a whirlwind. I thought for sure with all my experience and education I would be able to get SOME type of job for reasonable pay. WRONG!!! I don’t know why I thought that – after all, I have lived here most of my life and know how it is. I went through 3 months of MAJOR depression. Crying everyday and feeling worthless. I have applied at over 80 companies and spent countless hours doing cover letters, tweaking my resume and filling out online apps. It is a wee bit FRUSTRATING to have experience and education and probably a better work ethic than many and not be able to get even a simple general office job. Because there was no way in heck I could just sit around and just look for work for someone else, I decided to start my own business. I found some hobbies of crafting and decided to start selling my stuff online. My friend does it and is very successful. It is going pretty good but it is a competitive market out there. I am pretty proud of what I have accomplished so far, but it is still not bringing home the bacon like I need it to and it is A LOT of work. The good thing about it is that I enjoy it. I don’t necessarily enjoy 15+ hour days but I am my own boss, the entrepreneur I believed I was always meant to be. No I don’t know if this is what I was meant to do or not, but I am going for it and I will find my niche sooner or later. In all honestly my passion is helping others, whether that be finding a job, making them feel confident about themselves, maybe hooking them up with someone else etc. Making others feel happy is what makes me happy. It is such a great feeling knowing you made a difference to someone. Even if it is the smallest thing. It makes my whole day when someone buys something from me and I get an email saying how much they love it. Awesome – Awesome – Awesome.

Many people call me crazy – not because they think I am really “insane” but because I am always going, going, going… I can’t slow down. And when I try to slow down I get lazy and I don’t like it. My head is over flowing with so many things, so many ideas, so many thoughts, I wish I had an external hard drive to plug into so I could I could put it all in there and get back to it when I am finished with the countless other things I have to be doing at all times. Ha ha But I am me, and I am proud of all the experience I have gained over the years. Some people might look at the variety of jobs I have had negatively. To me, it has made me WELL-ROUNDED. As the saying goes “I am a Jack of all Trades and Master of None”. But that is ok with me. Because I would rather know a little about a lot of things then a lot about one thing. I am a life-long learner and plan to learn as much as my brain can handle. I am going to LIVE LIFE to its fullest potential!! Well as full as I can living where I am unless I can convince my family to all move south with me 🙂 I DO NOT LOVE THESE LONG COLD WINTERS.

Have a great day – stay POSITIVE and thanks for reading my lengthy post.

Rebeca~

Friday Night Funny!!

Frank Feldman

A man walks out to the street and catches a taxi just going by.

He gets into the taxi, and the cabbie says, “Perfect timing. You’re just like Frank.”

Passenger: “Who?”

Cabbie: “Frank Feldman….he’s a guy who did everything right all the time. Like my coming along when you needed a cab, things happened like that to Frank Feldman every single time.”

Passenger: “There are always a few clouds over everybody.”

Cabbie: “Not Frank Feldman. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone, and danced like a Broadway star. And you should have heard him play the piano! He was an amazing guy.”

Passenger: “Sounds like he was something really special.”

Cabbie: “There’s more. He had a memory like a computer. He remembered everybody’s birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order, and which fork to eat them with. And he could fix anything. Not like me-I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out. But Frank Feldman, he could do everything right.”

Passenger: “Wow, some guy then.”

Cabbie: “He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams. Not like me, I always seem to get stuck in them. But Frank, he never made a mistake, and he really knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. He would never answer her back, even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too. He was the perfect man! He never made a mistake. No one could ever measures up to Frank Feldman.”

Passenger: ” An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?”

Cabbie: “Well…I never actually met Frank. He died, and I married his wife.”

Thought this was pretty funny. Had to share. Enjoy your evenings!

Rebeca~

Friday Random Rave!!

Good Morning – Are we all happy it is Friday? Now that I work from home I really have to think about what day it is – Kinda funny, kinda sad all at the same time because I work everyday. But I LOVE IT. I am a creator, so how awesome is that to be able to just go and create something awesome anytime you want to?

I work in my basement. Normally it is just the sweet sound of the electric heater I have going but that started to smoke so I haven’t used it in days. I needed something to drown out the quiet so I decided to start listing to music. Why I didn’t do this much before is beyond me, yet quite obvious now. You see, I started yesterday and was listing to the “Ladies of the 80’s” station – OMG all I wanted to do was dance. As soon as “Nasty” came on by Janet Jackson https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ldi9677mj60 I jumped my butt out of my chair and went crazy. It brought me back a good 25+ years when my friends and I made up a dance to this song. And believe it or not I REMEMBERED it. GOOD TIMES. Add 10 years or so to that decade and I used to listen to “Push It” by Salt-N-Pepper https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k4onJ7Z2MLI. How could you not dance to this stuff? Anyways I got quite the workout and felt great.

We brought our pooch in to the vet for the first time. Just like a Doc visit, we checked in, waited, got put in a room, waited – then she came in and wanted a urine sample. Outside we went with a little tray. Seriously, this is really how its done? I about burst when they were trying to attempt to take a urine same from Ruby, especially with the EXTRA LARGE St. Bernard sitting in this tiny car having a stare down with her. lol I forgot to mention, Ruby is not scared and will jump on any size dog to play. Luckily they stayed in the vehicle until we went in, OR I would have gotten another good workout trying to catch her. Back in, time to take a rectal temp. Ruby jumps on my husbands lap and stands with front paws on his shoulders. Looked like she was saying “ok I am ready do your thing and get it over with” ha ha. I am finding out more and more that Dogs are more human than we think.

On to today – I started my jam sessions with a little trucking music. I grew up in a trucking family AND worked for them for 10 years so I am fond of this music. So many songs have such great meaning. Give this one a listen https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5zoTLwrm9QE Yet, there are so many that make me wanna jump out of my seat – like this one… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=igtD5s2fZwc. I love music of all kinds…. If you need a pick me up, punch up your favorite oldie but goodie on YouTube and get to shaking what your momma gave you!

Needless to say I am getting a lot of dancing done today too 🙂

It is time to start and finish a bunch of projects so I better get to it. But I am curious to know your thoughts on music and production (meaning does it help to get things done or not so much?) and what decade of music is your favorite and why? I would love to have you link your favorite song from the past in a reply back to this so I can listen to them and learn a little more about your taste of music.

Enjoy this beautiful day!

A simple “I Love You” means more than money. “Frank Sinatra”

Rebeca~

My kids are gonna love me tonight!

One of my all time favorite treats back in the day, which I can’t ever seem to find when I’m craving one is a frozen PUDDIN’ POP. Remember these??

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Well I have thought about making them before but you know how it goes sometimes. I was at the grocery store last night and seen this…

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So you KNOW I had to get it. Then to decide… Vanilla or Chocolate ohhhh they are both so good!

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I went with Chocolate BUT I am so doing the swirl next!

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All frozen and ready to savor for dessert after dinner. Make your own today 🙂

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Do something special and make these for your favorite valentine and attach this little cute note!

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Sweet, Simple, DDDDDD-Licious!

Enjoy!

Rebeca~

Comfort in any position!

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Good Morning! I just had to post these pics I just got of my pooch Ruby! I WISH I could sleep in any position like her!!! Unfortunately I must always be on my side near a fetal position haha 🙂

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Mom I’m still sleepy!!!

Have a beautiful day all.

Rebeca~